in this story

i am also                      the one who leaves

the baby who rolled away

down a long hospital hallway

never to return

 

i did it

just like the women

before me

 

first mama       giving into the emptiness

of her unwilling womb

leaving small parts of herself

buried in the earth like treasure

 

then mother     enduring my kicks in secret

nine months of punishment from the baby

she did not want to keep as her own

 

and me             a woman now

living all the way across the country

kicking lovers out of my bed

refusing to return to anyone

 

a disappearing act         the finale

 

even when i am wanted

i don’t know how to belong

 —

By Mariama Lockington

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